Five years, five months, and twenty-one days ago, on June 6, 2015, I wrote a long winded blog post titled, "What I Write About When I Write About Running." That was soon after my 54 year old brother-in-law had died (too soon), as well as my first boss when I worked at Winn-Dixie in the 1980's (he was an extremely healthy runner). The preciousness of life was surely at the forefront of my mind. That was four months before my Dad died in October of the same year.
In that post, I went on and on about my most recent come-to-Jesus moment about dieting and fitness. I had just attended a Rush concert (one of the last before legendary drummer Neil Peart died in early 2020) with two of my best friends from elementary and high school, respectively. I had purchased a concert T-shirt - the largest size they had - 2XL. It didn't fit then as I weighed 284.8 pounds at the time. I vowed to return to a smaller size and wear that shirt, which I proudly displayed in my 2015 blog post as I waxed eloquently about life, Rush, and running.
I planned to accomplish my goal by running - a go-to exercise that I actually enjoyed back in my 20's due to the endorphin rush it used to give me. Nothing drops weight on me like vigorous exercise. I read the Haruki Murakami book about running and psyched myself up real good, as I had so often done on every other diet. I set out to running (jogging) alternating with walking every 1/10 of a mile, much in the style of Henry Dillard, who knew how to progress from 1/10 to 2 miles, literally one step at a time over the course of weeks. Well, that scheme didn't last long as I incurred knee pain in one knee and then the other, which later led to torn meniscuses in both, requiring surgeries in 2016 and 2017. The days of the 280 pound running man were short-lived. And over.
Since my last blog post at 8-weeks post-op, I had another NSV worth mentioning. All my size 46-48 waist jeans are too big for me. I can't yet fit in the stack of size 38's Levi's I have waiting from the 1990's, so I was shopping on Amazon for a size 40. I followed the link I used to buy the 48's and literally cried a tear of joy when the size 40 was not an option... in the Big & Tall section where I was looking. I had to look in the "regular" clothes section. Happy day.
Speaking of T-shirts and NSVs, I have begun the process of removing the 3X and relaxed-fit 2X sized T-shirts from my drawers. In their place, I have rotated in many 2XL shirts that were always a little tight and maybe even some XL shirts that are loose. These are shirts ranging from 5-20 years old. I have quite a selection of T-shirts from our honeymoon in Australia in 1997. Many of those were XL and only worn a few times as Lori got pregnant soon afterwards and I put on "pregnancy sympathy pounds" that never came off. The 3X shirts and size 46-48 pants are going into storage, hopefully never to be used again.
The last month has definitely continued the trend towards normal eating. By normal I mean that I can eat just about anything I used to eat, I just can't eat a lot of it. I still can fill up and feel satisfied with only a handful size portion of anything. Previously, some foods, especially if eaten too fast, would feel like I'd swallowed a rock for a few minutes. I still haven't thrown up even once. About 6 weeks ago, I could only eat about half a Five Guys single cheeseburger. About 2 weeks ago, I ate about 90% of a single cheeseburger from Five Guys. This past week, I ate an entire Whopper Junior cheeseburger from Burger King. I'm not trying to work my way up to eating a regular Whopper cheeseburger AND a chicken sandwich as I once could/would do. I'm just trying to point out that there is a reasonable "small/regular" size of foods that I can tolerate now. In fact, in some restaurants, I will order a kids' meal and be satisfied with that. In other cases, I will order a full entree, and divide it into halves or thirds and get 1-2 additional meals out of it.
This brings to mind the advice my surgeon gave me: pre-measure my meals before I eat them. We are so used to filling or over-filling a plate and then joining the "Clean Your Plate Club" that it is a hard habit to break. So that is the type of mindfulness I am trying to do now.
I have been able to enjoy a coffee after breakfast now. I don't have it every day, but perhaps I could. I'm still having a 1-egg omelette or a scrambled egg 2-3 times a week. I have a small bowl of cereal 2-3 days a week. One day last week, I had a single pancake for breakfast. Man that was so good. I can have a whole Chick-fil-A sandwich now. We are cooking healthy meals at home about 2-3 times a week from Hello Fresh which is really good (and fun). I can have an occasional beer without issues. My energy level is great and I feel so much better not lugging around 68 extra pounds.
One thing I'm noticing now that I've never experienced before is loose skin. I'm seeing it in my neck and belly. This is common with bariatric patients once they lose a lot of weight. The most I've lost on any diet was 44 pounds. So I'm more than 20 beyond that now. I hope it will tighten up over time, especially as I get back into the gym. Someday.
Today marks 12 weeks since surgery. I've updated my cool progress graphic. Onward to week 13!
